What's up with life?

Fallen too deep, but never undefeated.

2009-12-06T15:52:00.002+08:00

You're all full of shit
You've never lived a day
Where you had to fight to live
Or known my kind of pain
I have embraced my hate
This is the life I know
A constant test of my strength
And my will to go on

And I can't change who I am
Or the role that I play
I suffer loss after loss
And I hate day after day

Undefeated
I'm fucking staying strong
Although I've fallen, I've never lost
I'm fucking staying strong
I'll never break no matter the cost

And I'm still here
Still fighting still standing strong
No matter how hard I'm hit
I'm going to get back up
And through it all
All the trials, every pain, every loss
I won't suffer defeat
I'll be the last man standing

Today is my fucking day
No matter what the odds

I'll remain undefeated

HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY BIG BOYYY!

2009-11-06T23:08:00.003+08:00

i'm all grown up now.

wish myself all the best for the upcoming new year.

AND, may all my wishes come true.

Down To Nothing

2009-10-26T20:14:00.003+08:00

what a boring month,
i'm so sicked of seeing my couples hugging, kissing each other.
how i wish i would be in their sit(position),
a bit jealous, i can say?
it's hard to find the right one,
i'm just waiting for someone to walk into my path of love,
then i'll see whether she's the right one for me.
it's sucks to see your guy friends, being with their girlfriends,
and you will be wondering,
(when will I ever find my true love?)

i'm seriously downnnn right now..
unfortunately, this is the worst one ever..
screw my life, it's gonna be my fxcking end.

P.S, i need you, only you, not anyone, to be by my side, like you always did.
And, you should know who you are.(n)

Cover The Face, Fuck The Base.

2009-09-23T05:28:00.002+08:00

i feel a bit upset nowadays.

ppl around are filled with problems.

ppl dislikes each other just because of looks, starring and also due to knowledge an stuffs.

i understand some of us want to like show or don't want to share.

but come on la, you don't need to hate or not making friends with person right?

isn't it unfair to some ppl?

(serious shit..... who are these peoples? are they inhuman or what...)

FUCK YOU SCUMHEAD MOTHA FUCKERS

2009-09-12T01:14:00.003+08:00

what's wrong with ppl nowadays sia? you all unhappy with me ah? knncb. not unhappy with me, confront me ah cb. no point being a gangster, or with a group of friends who thinks that they are brutal, mixing around with ex-gangsters and shitz. like come on la. been there done that la eh. serious sia, if you all not happy come one-one la cb. don't need to call friends help you beat me up la fucker. why? got no balls ah?! pcb. nowadays i can tell people if they are a two-face bastard, backstabber, likes to spred rumours and shits, whatever it is, I DONT GIVE A DAMN

LA FUCK!!!!!! i'm going to beat you down idiot scum.

(THESE GOES OUT TO ALL OF YOU WHO ARE READING THIS POST. IF YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH ME, COME CONFRONT LA SIA. CAN TALK, DON'T WANT TO TALK).

bitch.

Guess Who's Back?

2009-09-10T00:17:00.002+08:00

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!
TOOLBAR HAS FINALLYYYYYYY APPEARR!
damn wtf sia.
lol.
anyways, straight-forward about what's happening now.
i just got a part time job.
only for 2 weeks.
the pay is bombastic.
gonna save it and spend it for what i want.

Is it too late for coffee?

2009-08-23T23:58:00.001+08:00

I was wrong to make a country club of my affection,
subjective love for those of my selection,
but now she's found someone to love her more than I ever could,
you look much better when you smiled,
you've been down for quite awhile,
amazed by the change in you,
much that I still won't admit to,
what brought about the words in me,
now sees the best in everything.

I'll still be right here waiting....

Searching for the hopeless soul.

2009-08-20T13:56:00.002+08:00

i want you so badly,

would you takeme back?

take me back and i'll make you feel the same like las time,

i miss you,

i miss you sooo,

i still love you,

and i will forever ever will do,

i cant be like those guys who are pocket loaded full of money,

i cant be the guy who can get the most expensive gift you've ever seen,

i cant be the guy who are much more dope than me,

all i can give is my love, a sense of security for you, and a ever-lasting care & concern from me,

i hope you understand me.

there's nothing that can't be done if raise our voice as one.

De-anger runs wilds.

2009-08-06T14:01:00.000+08:00

fuck la. the toolbar is gone again. cb. how to post pics and videos?
fuck la blogger. i feel like chnaging to tumblr or wordpress.
I DO NOT KNOW WHY?! LIKE A SOME BOO DEHHH?! LOL. fuck sia ownage pranks.
makes it wanna laugh my stomachs out. hahaha.
gtg. meeting haikal, zach, nerd, kurt at town now. it's time for some action.
HIAK!

Loving what you see?

2009-08-03T00:11:00.003+08:00

nowadays, everywhere i got, surely got mat-reps staring at me, and our friends.
i mean like come on la, got no life ah stare at ppl?
cb sia, irritating fuck man.
feel like want to beatdown sia, crush their bones till cripple, pock their fucking eyes make them blind.
just now as i was walking home, there's this group of mat-reps sitting at the stairs.
for dk what wtf they sit there for.
then as i was walking they satre like one kind, i stared at them back.
i heard them talking about me.
so, what i did was i went up to that guy and sounded him.
"who the fuck you think you are huh?? you dare, beat me uh".
so then i walk off, guess that guys balls has stucked up in his throat.
i'm not afraid of you little bastards, thinks that joining a gang is cool.
well then, fuck you. i'm not afraid of you and you leader. so what if your leader did killed someone or wnet to prison for how many fucking times?
fuck that shit. you're nothing, but a piece of shit.

guys, i got a video of y'all. those who BYD is not 'X', well there are. see these!

Inspirational Thought

2009-07-23T01:26:00.004+08:00

How I wish i could go to japan and meet this two guys?

Nigo(left) founder of BAPE, while Hiroshi Fujiwara(Fragment Design),

this two talented designers are my inspiration.

OH, and not to forget:

Esteven Oriol.

SERA LA.

Mara Putos ese.

2009-07-21T22:42:00.002+08:00

i shall blog abt last sat.
went to jb to catch SF and Kotm release. met kurt, nerd, dan, amirul, naem and nas.
went to zamani restoran to eat.
ate maggi goreng.
YUMMY!
haha.
then proceed to the gig venue.
cabbed there.
funniest part was amirul nearly kena kidnapped.
LOL!
couldn;t imagine what it feels like if he really kena kidnapped.

30mins later, reached the venue.
we were the first to came.
haha

LEPAKZZZZ...
then gig started.
sf opening,
not many start the fire.
less crowd.
it's okay.
then burnout, driven and bloody played.
and yeah!, bloody covered Bad Brains - Attitude.
Jyeah, did circle pit.
after lepakzz..
me, naem and dan headed home first.
naem sis fetch the both of us.
went to singgah selalu..
and finally HSH.

2009-07-17T03:21:00.003+08:00

“I used to think that labels were just a symbol of pride, but over time I’ve seen they only serve to divide. It’s so easy to judge people by the way they seem to be, we must overcome this problem to live life peacefully. Break down the walls, yes, we’ll break down the walls!Look beyond the fashion or the crowd that they are in, look beyond their riches or the color of their skin, look beyond appearance and the truth you will find, look for what’s inside before you make up your mind!” - Youth Of Today

The Hardcore scene is so unique, it’s like a religious community, but watch for the little corrupter inside. To be honest, I’ve never seen or read or hear that there’s any other music scene that is so full of dedicated people in it, that is only doing the works in it for the sake of the scene and not for anything else. The other music scene is only filled with money grabbing, rockstar wannabe, greedy businessmen and so much more. To be short, Hardcore is way better than other music scene, but it does still have a flaw. That’s normal because it’s not like it is a great religion with a great prophet and a great holy book. It’s just an idea, not a belief. That’s why it was bound to have its own conflict, problems, and far from being perfect.
If we view it generally, a lot of people in it talk about supporting and helping one another, but reality is, we’re still divided by small differences be it from lifestyle, music, fashion, and so on. Straight Edge kids don’t hang out with non-Straight Edge kids has been an issues for years. People still bruising each other with issues like commercialism, turning Hardcore into big business, who’s more DIY, who’s with more better crew, and so on. Somehow, this is what that makes the scene sour and divided into many division.

This fight becoming a routine, because a lot of people just have not much to do, so they fight each other over petty issues. The scene becomes smaller, weak and it’s an open door for outsider to get in and pour a salt into the wounded. People fight for 10 minutes and then live like normal people, so how can the Hardcore scene progress and getting stronger if this attitude keep going on? It’s like you watching news on TV, and you saw a 12years old Palestinian kid died after been shot by an Israel soldier, you get so angry and curse the whole Israel nation and swore you want to slay every one of them before everything else. After 30 minutes, the TV starts to broadcast “Reality Show”, or “Corporate Business Drama”, and that’s it, everything back to normal. Maybe 2-3 days or weeks or months later, when you hear the same thing on TV about women, oldest, children in Iraq died in explosive, you look for something to blame, and after 30 minutes everything back to earth once again. That’s why I said, it’s just a routine, but that’s a Malaysian society, being a caring nation as always. What exactly do we do?

The lyric of the song “Break down the Walls” by Youth of Today is not just an ordinary Hardcore song. The message is so simple and direct but it is super strong.
These days, separation is here and nobody really care. Bands get on stage and just playing music, crowd having fun and then go home, people sells stuffs, and others just want to socializing. This is all just a part of the Hardcore scene on weekend, and on weekdays, people mind their own business. Everything else back to normal. There’s nothing wrong with all this, but what are we gonna do with the real problem at hands that’s been going for days, weeks, months, years? We can’t change this world when we can’t even sit well together. Lets change problems within ourselves first, so that we can begin to fight for the peaceful world!Lets break down the walls that clouded us for years, lets do it!

"Time Still Here HXC Zine"

2009-07-14T22:51:00.002+08:00

"boy, your true strength sleeps behind your eyes!"

- Have Heart - Armed with a mind.

xOnce Againx

2009-07-01T03:59:00.002+08:00

fuck la.

i know i'm irritating la bitch.

just admit.

blog about me indirectly.

na bei ci bai.

just say it straight forward fuck.

what.

just because i call you everytime, i'mirritating you?

FUCK YOU, WHORE!

i'm your fxcking ex-boyfriend,

i called you because i care for you.

i know exams are near la fuck.

but then, you don't need to ignore like as if i'm wall.

seriously, you've changed.

don't even i got lots of girlfriends out there.

don't keep saying that i always got lots of friends out there as well.

DON'T ASSUME ME BITCH!

i still care for you deeply, truely.

is this what i get, although i've treated you badly, and seek forgiveness from you?

it seems you are just a fucking two-face bastard.

idk what else to say, but...

I HOPE YOU WRITE THIS BLOODY FUCKING POST.

NOT HAPPY, GO FIND YOUR FRIENDS OR GANGSTER FRIENDS BEAT ME UGH!

I'M NOT AFRAID..

GANGSTERS ARE A PUSSY!?!?!

keep that in mind.

you're a coward by doing that.

Sadistic Life Of "I"

2009-06-26T08:55:00.003+08:00

P.S;

I'm Down About Everything.

Things Are Starting To get Uneven.

Will Someone Help Me With My Unstoppable Problems?

Love Is Lust,

Love Is Pure,

Love Is Sexy,

Love Is Cool,

Love Is GOLD.

"A Man With Realistic Goals,

Knows Where To Goes,

He, Is The Man Of His World,

A Man That Never Regrets Being Old"

2009-06-05T14:18:00.002+08:00

"Is this the end of the world, or is God playing tricks on us?" -

Larry King

2009-06-04T06:35:00.005+08:00

to be or not to be,

it's hard to find someone who can love you.
expression: sad

sometimes, it's hard for us to let it go,

but then deep down, it's cramp, unbearable, unstoppable.

you can only see an empty hole through it.

2009-05-27T00:02:00.001+08:00

DAMNNN UH FUCK!!
HOW I WISH I COULD GO AND SEE THEM!
MOST OF THEM ARE MY FAVOURITE BANDS.
XREPRESENTX, PLAYING WITH HAVE HEART?!?!
GOTTA BE JOKING MOTHA' FUCKS.
THE ORGANISER MUST BE NUTS.
BUT HE SURE IS FUCKINGWRECKED AND KIND ENOUGH TO LET THEM PLAY SHARE THE STAGE TOGETHER.
THIS IS WHAT HARDCORE MEANS, FRIENDSHIP, BROTHERHOOD, NO MATTER WHICH STATE OR COUNTRY YOU LIVED, YOU ONE PASSION, ONE PRIDE - hardcore.

CHEERS!
;DD

2009-05-25T00:21:00.000+08:00

HOORRRAYYY!
HOLIDAYS ARE COMING!
SO HAPPY.
I WANT TO GO GET NEW CLOTHES AND 2 NEW PAIR OF JEANS.
HAHAHA.
BTW guys, i know my blog is boring.
but nvm.
as long, i can write down my feelings & thoughts, is consider good enough already.
mut appreciate.
LOL.
;DD
AND ALSO, i want to make more friends.

2009-05-13T21:35:00.000+08:00

finally updating.

yeah, this week HAVE HEART!

POWER AH.

NEXT WEEK BREAK EVEN, FINAL ATTACKK!!!!

HAPPPYY GILEERRRR!

confirm our crew will happy as fuck.

2009-03-28T12:55:00.000+08:00

misery signals today.

all my will release today.

i will have to release it.

yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, YES!!!

mak oi.

perangai mcm porn.

alright nvm. hahaha.

gotta catch dick tracy.

Guys, do check dick tracy at their myspace.

here's the link: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=429542561

2009-03-26T22:05:00.000+08:00

taken at malaysia.

had a great time.

thanks joanna for the pictures.

next show, H-H!

I ain't no fashioncore matha' fuckers.

2009-03-22T03:16:00.000+08:00

wah fuck.
sorry guys if i didnt quite update on my blog.
well, there it goes..
boring as usual.
holidays are ending,
as if i'm leaving my joyness behind.
ah fuck, everything.
i'll still be happy though :D

Sick & Tired.

2009-03-10T13:28:00.000+08:00

now in school.
boring.
lesson as usual.
blogging on this small notebook.
MSi Wind Notebook.
hais.
i cant forget you (J).

2009-02-19T22:45:00.000+08:00

amazing race today.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

the most funniest day i've ever had.

my team members were yc, hari, basil & hafiz.

the task of the race is to finish a cross-puzzle that mr firman gave us.

it was so easy that we finish first among the the other groups.

CHICKEN FEET TO THE MAX SIOLZXZXZXZ!!

hah.

then went to S with yc & hari.

the funny part is that hafiz fell when taking the lift.

DAMN CLUMSY SIA.

the lift trembled & started shaking.

all faster ran out, because scared something might happen.

hahaha!

pics will be up soon.

;DDD

The Brain-washing of Jaywee's memory. HAHAHAHA!

2009-02-19T01:47:00.000+08:00

Jaywee says:
hahaha
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
you going out this friday?
Jaywee says:
erm dont know, why?
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
err, i thought of meeting you or something then know each other much better(as in friends)!
Jaywee says:
haha serious ah?
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
yeah, if you dont mind
Jaywee says:
haha but i very ugly leh
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
i dont go for looks
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
i'm not that kind of guys
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
seriously,
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
i dont mind knowing anyone, everyone in this world
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
butt you look okay what, since i did saw you before ;DD
Jaywee says:
hahah when sia
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
at wisma, haha
Jaywee says:
when la
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
long time, i think it was last 2 weeks or 3 weeks ago
Jaywee says:
ohhh wait
Jaywee says:
is it like the outside there
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
like duh! yes la, haha
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
i was walking with a girl, which was my cousin
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
night time?? can remember already?
Jaywee says:
is it my dp
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
yes!
Jaywee says:
ohhhhh
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
hahahaha
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
thank god -.-
Jaywee says:
hahahah why thank god
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
finally you remembered!
Jaywee says:
hahaha
Jaywee says:
eh then why nvr say hi
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
take so long for you to remember
Imran Mran Ran - Away! says:
because i'm shy
Jaywee says:
hahahaha

HAPPY DAY FOR ME BODOHHHH!?!

2009-02-18T23:31:00.000+08:00

alamak, aiyoyo, pfffftttt!?!?!??!!
today was super shagg x tiring man.
leg muscles ahces are killing me.
ARRRGGHHH?!?!
bwei tahan siol.
how am i going to brisk walk like that?
aches here & there, EVERYWHERE!
fuck.
but i try to control the pain.
today, met up with duffy.
went to cineleisure.
suddenly bumped into M.I.L! ^^
guess who?
anybody knows right?
shuddup uh!
^^
chit-chat with her, ciggs here & there.
then trained home with duffy, as he's feeling tired.
M.I.L went to have her LJS.
didnt join her as to accompany duffy home.
that's about it.
;DDD

2009-02-17T21:00:00.000+08:00

today was tiring.
although i didn't went to school.
but went for street soccer competition.
but in the end lose.
the other team tyco. my keeper was ready at all.
nvm, my team will strife harder.
looking for to friday.
^^
i hope it's great.(T.G.I.F)

Sianzxzxz?!

2009-02-16T05:45:00.000+08:00

so bored.
i dont know why i cant sleeppp.
i guess i will fall asleep in school later. DAMNIT!
still got cross country training after school -.-!!!
alamak.
if i faint, then i'll just sit in the hospital.
HAHAHA!
then get MC for how many days.
OH yeahh!, i read "LYNETTE's" blog just now.
cant believe what she said to me.
she likes to talk about the past lorrr.
cheebss~!
dare to call me flirt somemore, wth!
HELLOOO!!, I'M SINGLE FOR 4 MONTHS ALREADY OKAY.
NOW FINDING PERFECT GERL.
NO GERL, NVM. SIT ONE CORNER, SING SONG, TALK COCK ALONE ALSO CAN HOR~!
hope that she'll will find out i just got a blog.
lots of things to do later after school.
seee yaaahh everyone.

2009-02-16T04:21:00.000+08:00

today was superbly gerekzx!! went to meet nerd, haikxl at substation.
watch overthrown, comrade.
was fun though.
until something happen.
want to know??
find out yourself ^^
alright that's about.
wahlau. first time using blog sia.